What's Bugging Bill

It's been quite a while since I've blogged; hard to believe that the summer is over. The summer was wonderful - my family had a couple of nice vacations, and we also got to enjoy the kiddie pool in the backyard several times. Times like these remind me of how truly blessed I am.

However, that doesn't mean that everything is perfect. There are a few things that bother me. I fully realize that these are minor problems in the grand scheme of things, but I wanted to get them off my chest.

1. Special weather reports
We are now in the middle of hurricane season. Whenever there is a major storm threatening the coast, you know what will happen next. Every news outlet will send a reporter to the "scene" to do a live report in the midst of the rain and gale-force winds. Does this add anything to our understanding? Frankly, if you're too dumb to come in from the rain/snow/whatever, then I don't think I can trust your judgement. We all know what storms look like. If the goal of the news is to warn us of the impending danger, then don't put your reporters in the same harm. It's time to learn a new trick, networks.

2. Refrigerators
The fridge in my house has the freezer on the top, and the refrigerator section beneath it. This is how it should be. Side-by-side models have been popular for quite some time, and now the "freezer on the bottom" seems to be the latest trend. To be blunt, I think that these are horribly wrong and against nature. Here in the Northern Hemisphere, it gets colder the further north you go. Anyone who has looked at a map knows that north is up, so therefore the coldest part of the fridge should be the highest. I urge all my reader(s) to start a letter-writing campaign to the appliance manufacturers demanding an end to their abhorrent practices.

3. Football-shaped Oreos
Oreos (in their pure single-stuff form) are my favorite cookie. In the past, I've complained about the inherent evil of double-stuff Oroes. Now, our friends at Nabisco have come up with a new way to torment me. This fall, they have issued football-shaped Oreos. They have the same thickness as regular Oreos, so they pass my initial test. However, do to their football shape, each cookie has a point on each end. I feel that this adds an undue level of danger to the cookie-eating experience. When consuming an Oreo, you should not have to worry about which end to pick up in order to avoid injury. Please, everyone, stick with the one true Oreo variety - the round single-stuff. It is the only way we can maintain order and civilization in our increasingly chaotic society.

Thanks for reading. And to answer your question: yes, there is a distinct possibility that I've lost my mind :-)